(not so) Happy Holidays

“Merry Christmas!” 

“Happy Holidays!” 

“Season’s Greetings!” 

Friendly, joyful words to hear this time of year…except, perhaps, when we’re grieving.

The holiday season is all about family and friends and gathering together, so when we’ve lost someone dear to us – maybe this is the first Christmas or Hanukkah or Kwanzaa without them – we may feel their absence all the more acutely.

How do we get through the holidays when grief makes cheeriness nearly impossible? 

If you really can’t face the parties, carols, crowds and banter, you can ignore the season completely. Go to Vegas. Take a cruise. Hole up until spring. 

Most of us, however, can not only “get through” the holidays, but can find some peace by giving ourselves permission: permission to grieve, to be sad. 

Find solace in the ways that feed your soul…a walk in nature, time with understanding friends. Let others know it’s okay to talk about and share memories of your loved one, even it brings tears. Crying is okay. So is laughing through the tears. 

One Over the Rainbow client who lost a brother had memorial jewelry made for herself and her siblings and presented them as Christmas gifts the year he died. 

Now, each holiday season when they gather, they wear their special pieces. All of them feel their brother’s presence…in the beauty of the stone on their wrist or finger, and in the spirit of the family holiday and memories they share. And that is a gift that will last forever.